bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
