i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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