PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
Randomize
