I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
