that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
Randomize
