i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
I think a kid would responsible me up
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
i think i just naturally attract stoners
Randomize
