Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
Randomize
