Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
