Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Well it involved jumping two nine foot fences. But when you mix alcohol and persistence you can't lose.
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
