I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
She was so happy she found her sunglasses, that she blew me. Im now randomly hiding things of hers in hopes she'll find them and I'll get a repeat performance.
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
My booty call is in the theater watching Deadpool right now. Never though comics would work against me.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
