Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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