so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Congratulations! We have a period
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
