we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It's no shave November. This is our time.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
