U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Bottom line; if I'm coming out of my bat cave to do the dishes and get a chicken wing and I have no pants or makeup on and my messy bun looks more like Santa got leprosy and crashed his sled into the back of my head then let me be. That's all I'm saying.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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