69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize