pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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