I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize