Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
