Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
