just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
