you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
You ruined the universe
Randomize
