i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
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