and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
