careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
