i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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