Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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