woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
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