She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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