it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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