grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
