ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
Randomize
