I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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