Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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