I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
