i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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