Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
