you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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