I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
We get an extra hour of sleep. That means we can take an extra shot tonight. Sound logic. Thank you daylight savings.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
