it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Well we're gonna drink when we get home and I just invited the cab driver to play beer pong
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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