if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
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