the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
Is it because I queefed?
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
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