I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
sarcasm needs its own font
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
