We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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