this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
