my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Randomize
