Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
