i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
Randomize
