Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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