he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
If kinky sex was an Olympic sport they would be playing the anthem for me as we speak.
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
