Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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