After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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