i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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