She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
